When? You Should Letting Go In Relationship

letting go in relationship

When? you should letting go in relationship. Letting go is one of the hardest things to figure out in life. As your emotions usually cloud your logic, and because your feelings make it harder for you to concentrate, it seems like the art of letting go can be confusing and complicated.

Everything in life is about finding the balance between holding on and letting go. We always strive to make the right choice, but choices are not always easy, especially when it comes to those we love, or let’s say the ones we think we love.

In relationships, we invest a lot of our emotions, time, and energy, and the more we invest, the harder it is to let go. Sometimes we do not let go because we fear the unknown, sometimes we do not let go out of fear of being alone, the reasons are many, but the end result is the same; living unhappily.

Should you let go of a particular person, of your current job, of your past feelings or of your resentment? Or should you hold on and let them consume you altogether?

When? You Should Letting Go in Relationship

You are not being yourself.

If you constantly have to pretend to be someone you are not out of fear of being judged or misunderstood, then you are not in the right place. A partner is the last person you want to wear masks around.

You’re expected to sacrifice your personal values and change into someone you’re really not.

In this life, your personal values and your vision are the things that make you who you are fundamentally. If your job or your lover or your friend forces you to be someone you’re not, let go. You are never going to be truly anyway.

You are not genuinely happy.

We are speaking about happiness here, not just getting along or coping. Well, obviously every relationship has its ups and downs, but not in any way should it be flatline monotonous and lifeless.

Your trust is continuously broken.

You’re vulnerable when you’re in love with an idea, a person, an event, or an accomplishment. They say that loving is letting the other party hurt you, but you’re trusting them not to do this, right? Well, if your lover consistently hurts you, or your loved ones consistently don’t care about your feelings, let go. You’ve already been hurt countless times; what makes you think the pain will stop if you continue holding on?

You want different things.

When partners are not on the same page and their goals and objectives differ widely, it will be hard for them to meet halfway. They both will be stuck in a relationship where instead of doing life together, each will be going a different path on their own, and accordingly, they gradually drift apart.

Staying in it always makes you feel broken, depressed and frustrated.

You truly dislike your job, your lover or your business. You don’t even know why you entered this in the first place. You hate who you’re with or what you’re doing. You’re not motivated to continue with it.

You are constantly criticized and barely appreciated.

Whether it is your looks, your behavior, or your ideas and beliefs, if your partner constantly criticizes you in public or in private this means they are unable to see the good in you.

You feel inferior.

Your self-worth is always under-appreciated. It seems like you never feel good anymore. You’re always taken for granted. Everyone expects you to show up, but when you’re already there, you’re not even respected! When it seems like you’re the only one doing the chasing, please do yourself a favor and just stop. Doing this is like beating yourself up everyday—just let go.

The passion and the good times are gone.

When the passion is gone, boredom and dullness overtake the relationship. This is a reason why many people cheat and seek to fill the emotional gap with someone else.

You justify that it’s worth holding on, when it’s really not.

“Oh, he forgot my birthday because she was busy…”

“He never introduced me to his friends because he tells me they’re not his real friends anymore…”

“My business partner didn’t mean to get us bankrupt; I’m sure he has a plan…”

“I love my job even though I’m always stressed and I never get a chance to spend time with my loved ones…right?”

Look at yourself and really listen to what you’re saying: do you honestly believe yourself? No. So let go.

You feel lonely most of the time.

A healthy relationship is one where partners are happily sharing their lives together, through thick and thin. If you feel that you go through everything alone while in a relationship, this is an unmistakable sign that it is already broken.

You can’t remember the last time you were happy.

When was the last time you were truly happy—as in really content, really satisfied and really comfortable with yourself? Don’t force yourself, my friend. If you really can’t remember, it’s time to let go and move on.

You are trying too hard and compromise a lot.

Relationships should be built on equal give-and-take. If you are doing all the hard work alone to maintain the relationship, chances are you will grow resentful and frustrated.

You find that you’re always the one making sacrifices.

Are you always the one who has to give up more time? More money? More input? Are you consistently the one who experiences more pain? More frustration? More anxiety? Go ahead and do yourself a favor and stop chasing.

You keep on finding excuses and justifications for their behavior.

If you feel the need to constantly find an excuse to why you are being neglected and try to defend them in front of your parents and friends, you are only choosing to blind yourself from seeing the truth.

Express yourself—when was the last time you did that?

If you find that your opinions are always suppressed and your feelings are never acknowledged, why are you still holding on? You know you’re better than this.

You are always fighting.

If all your communications fail and you end up fighting and arguing, this is an indicator that both of you are not compatible and do not understand one another enough. It can also be a sign of pent-up anger and frustration.

You refuse to acknowledge the present because it hurts too much.

Instead of facing the present situation, you choose to live in the past because in the past, happy memories are there to comfort you. You live in a delusion and you try to fool yourself into thinking that everything will work out in the end, even though every fiber in your being knows that it’s not.

The relationship drains your energy.

Being around the person you love should bring you warmth, joy, and lift your spirits up; should never feel like a chore or an obligation. If you are in a relationship that constantly makes you feel under the weather and in need of some solo time, you are definitely in the wrong place, with the wrong person.

There’s inconsistency. Every single time.

When the person you’re dealing with has a gift with words, it’s so easy to take the back seat and allow yourself to be swayed. However, keep in mind that not everything can be fixed via words. If he’s saying one thing and then acting another way, it’s usually a bad sign.

Your business partner says he’ll fix it but he never makes an effort to do so? Let go.

Your lover promises that he’ll never cheat again, but he does. Let go.

Your loved ones promise that they’ll act according to what makes you happy, but they don’t? Let go.

You experience fear in the relationship.

You think twice before you speak or react because their reactions always intimidate you and make you feel nervous. If you walk on eggshells around your partner and constantly feel worried that what you say or do will upset them, you need to free yourself from the chains of this relationship.

You’ve already exhausted all your efforts but everything stays the same.

When you’ve done everything that you could, when all the promises that were made are just empty words, when it’s not worth your time, your money, your tears or your frustration anymore…

Let go.

You’re not living in a fairy tale. People break promises. Lovers hurt you. Your business partners can fool you. Not everyone out there is looking out for you.

Remove the toxic thought that holding on can change things.

Let go and let live. You know you deserve to.

You’re in it hoping things will change.

You’ve been trying for so long to fix it, but you still know and feel it in your heart that you are not happy. In such a situation, you are only holding to the slight chance that they might change, waiting for things to get better, or maybe because you think you this is the best you can get.

Relationships should bring out the best in us, help us grow, evolve, and most importantly help us unmask our true selves. Your partner should feel like home, the one you’ll run to and not run from. If you are in a relationship where both of you do not give one another something to look forward to together every day, you are doing life with the wrong person.

Caption & Quotes

Jason Ross – Letting Go