Humor is good for our lives and those around us. And this is the advantage of funny sayings. that help creative ideas This is a short funny quotes about life. Pass on a good sense of humor to others.🤣
Best Short Funny Quotes About Life
- “The planet is fine. The people are fuck*d.”🌏😩
- “Accept who you are. Unless you’re a serial killer.”😅😂
- “Life is too short to remove USB safely.”🤭
- “When would he learn that women never stayed where you put them?”🤔
- “The best things in life are free. The rest are too expensive.”😂💸
- “Life is not about how you survive the storm, it’s about how you dance in the rain.”😲🌪️
- “I don’t like hello. It makes me sound like I have dementia, like I’ve never heard a phone ring before and I don’t know what’s supposed to happen next. Hello?”🧐
- “I look to the future because that’s where I’m going to spend the rest of my life.”🤔
- “People who didn’t need people needed people around to know that they were the kind of people who didn’t need people.”🥱
- “There’s nothing more contagious than the laughter of young children; it doesn’t even have to matter what they’re laughing about.”😂
- “Can we go back to using Facebook for what it was originally for – looking up exes to see how fat they got?”😝
- “That’s the secret to life… replace one worry with another…”🤨
- “All I know is just what I read in the papers, and that’s an alibi for my ignorance.”😅
- “The shortest horror story: The last man on Earth sat alone in a room. There was a knock on the door.”👻
- “If life is not smiling at you, give it a good tickling.”😄
- “Believe me, It would be better if we didn’t meet again. Go back to school. Go back to your life. And next time they ask you, say no. Killing is for grown-ups and you’re still a child.”😄
- “In life, we must find happiness. I’ve been looking everywhere and still haven’t found it.”😂
- “Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.”😉
- “If an apology is followed by an excuse or a reason, it means they are going to commit same mistake again they just apologized for.”😉
- “Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.”😅🧐
Short Very Funny Quotes About Life
- “I did not attend his funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.”😄
- “Life is always rocky when you’re a gem.”🤣💎
- “I really should do something with my life… maybe tomorrow.”😆
- “We’ve all got weaknesses. Me, for instance. I’m tragically funny and good-looking.”🤣
- “Me: For the first time in life, things seem to be getting better.😄 Life: LOL, give me a second!😏”
- “Before you criticize a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you do criticize him, you’ll be a mile away and have his shoes.”😂
- “My congratulations to you, sir. Your manuscript is both good and original; but the part that is good is not original, and the part that is original is not good.”😉
- “The most fun things in life are either immoral, illegal or they make you fat.”😅
- “My goal in life is to have a psychiatric disorder named after me.”🥴
- “If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the up button.”😇
- “The sun, with all those planets revolving around it and dependent on it, can still ripen a bunch of grapes as if it had nothing else in the universe to do.”🌞🍇
- “Life status: Currently holding it all together with one bobby pin.”😆
- “Dogs have their day but cats have 365.”🤣🐈
- “Friends are chocolate chips in the cookie of life!”🤤🍪
- “I tried looking at the bright side of life, but it hurt my eyes.”😵💫
- “If everyone in the world sat quietly at the same time, closed their eyes and concentrated as hard as they could on peace and goodwill, all the killing and cruelty in the world would continue. And probably increase.”🤓🌎
- “When life closes a door, just open it again. It’s a door, that’s how they work.”😆
- “Any girl can be glamorous. All you have to do is stand still and look stupid.”😂
- “I only have one wish in life… For all my dreams to come true.”🤣🌈
- “If you can’t do anything about it, laugh like hell.”😂
Famous Short Funny Quotes About Life
- “They love their hair because they’re not smart enough to love something more interesting.”😉
- “Life is too short to worry about matching socks.”😂
- “When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye.”😂
- “Yeah, well. I don’t try to be awesome. It just comes natural.”😎
- “My life is just a series of awkward moments separated by snacks.”🤤🍟
- “I never hated a man enough to give him his diamonds back.”😅💎
- “You just can’t live a full life on an empty stomach.”😆
- “I am physically, mentally and emotionally ready to enter a new phase in my life… hibernation.”😴
- “Dear life, I understand very clearly that you are not fair so you can stop teaching me that lesson.”🥲
- “A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.”😂
- “Starting tomorrow whatever life throws at me, I’m ducking so it hits someone else.”😅
- “Life is the dash between the birth date and the passed away date.”😌
- “You know how teachers tell you the magic word is ‘please’? That’s not true. The magic word is ‘puke’. It will get you out of class faster than anything else.”😆
- “Life always offers you a second chance. It’s called tomorrow.”😉
- “Roses are red, violets are blue, I have five fingers, the middle one is for you.”😄🌹🖕
- “Wow. What’d he do to deserve that? Rescue orphans from a burning building? If so, you might want to make sure he didn’t set the building on fire in the first place.”🤔
- “Life is like a very long TV show, without a remote control.”🤔
- “Some stories have to be written because no one would believe the absurdity of it all.”😂
- “What I actually want to call you is a hell of a lot more unprintable than your name”😈
- “She says you’re not awake until you’re actually out of bed and standing up.”🤣